101 things to do with bacon that don’t involve eating it

That was the original intention of this post. To actually find 101 things that you could do with bacon. But, alas, I have kids, and a life. But I did manage to find some good ones. So, here you go:

1.  Bacon roses for the man in your life.
2.  Bacon lip balm, for when you feel like slathering bacon grease on your face.
3.  A bacon gun….. wtf…. how drunk did this person have to be to come up with this?
4.  Oh, for the love of all things disgusting…. a meat horse?
5.  A bacon bra. I certainly hope it’s not held together with toothpicks.
6. And, of course, why not a bacon dress to go over your bacon bra?
7. For those who would rather have bacon than a boyfriend….
8. Screw Tiffany lamps…. buy bacon instead!
9.  Yet another bacon gun…. is this REALLY that popular?
10.  Bacon and Star Wars? Please…. no one show this to my husband. I beg you.
11.  Here is a collection of bacon tattoos. No, they aren’t actually MADE from bacon grease tattoo ink… but still. Some people love their bacon apparently.
12.  Because we all want to thing about how fat we are getting while we are in the sack…… bacon lube.
13.  A bacon cremation. I’m speechless.
14. Bacon soap. Because instead of ingesting the greasiness, you would rather lather, rinse, and repeat.
15.  Bacon candles. For that nice homey bacon grease smell.
16.  For the times when you are too lazy to actually make bacon, use Squeez Bacon.
17.  For those of you that want to attract every stray dog in the neighborhood, there’s bacon perfume.
18.  Something tells me these shoes don’t have very good traction.
20.  And of course… you know SOMEBODY had to do it.
And here I thought that what people did with Peeps was bad. Didn’t these people have parents that told them not to play with their food? Or give them the ‘starving kids in Ethiopia’ speech?  I’d rather eat my bacon any day.
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PS- This post is totally dedicated to my dad, who coined the phrase ‘Bacon is meat candy’.

7 comments for “101 things to do with bacon that don’t involve eating it

  1. April 25, 2011 at 4:45 am

    Ewwww, bacon lube??!! Thanks for the fun post!

  2. April 25, 2011 at 5:39 am

    go away! 'baten! oh wait i like bacon

  3. April 25, 2011 at 8:01 am

    WOW!!! Totally Bacon'd my mind!!!

  4. Amy
    April 25, 2011 at 9:38 am

    Although this involves eating it *shudder* I heard a commercial on the radio the other day from Denny's – they're now putting bacon on ice cream?!?!?! With maple syrup?I love my bacon, but still…..

  5. April 25, 2011 at 9:47 am

    Love this post. Makes me giggle. 🙂

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